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I seem very easy to be happy
I seem very easy to be sad
I require myself for so much
I achieved so little
I have so much standards and rules
But I can only follow one or two of them
Because I always lack energy
It seems like I lack energy for everything sometimes

One warm face from a stranger
or a decent behavior I found
I cheer for them in my heart
I laugh so loud so happily
It's like my life is based on them
But I feel empty
I must be needy
I condemn myself
It's A tail I always try to get rid of from ten years ago
But then never succeed
Insecured, unsured and scared
I wish people to like me
My armour and barriers set for the world are built from smiling, being happy and nice
sometimes it's coldness
But they are all so fragile
It's still not strong enough to protect me

But I think I'm getting better
Because now I think once in a while
but not always
And I am not worthy of being loved
It really looked like my own goddamn abyss at that time
That even at the thought of it, I was destroyed
Yeah I'm definitely getting better
Because all my friends are getting better
so must I

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